Guru life coach, Cheryl Richardson, reminds us that there is nothing selfish about self care; this is especially important for military families. Self care is more than treating ourselves to something luxurious; it’s taking time for what matters most so that we are balanced and fulfilled. Self care is not only healthy it is actually one of the best ways to show support for those who serve because the more self sufficient we are, the more energy we have for ourselves, and to give to others.
Self care isn’t about overindulging or overspending; it is about taking care of yourself (i.e. creating that time to take a walk on the beach) and there are numerous ways to pamper yourself without breaking the bank. For example, I recently called a massage school and booked an hour and half massage with one of their student practitioners for just $30.00. This reasonably priced relaxation was just what I needed as a career coach, and mother of four kids. Another military spouse shared an equally frugal, tip. She signed up for personal training at a fraction of the cost with a student trainer at a University near where she was stationed. Her new customized workout, coupled with support and accountability, was just the gift she needed to give herself.
Self care is more than these simple acts; it is giving us permission for downtime; time to relax. It is not realistic to put consistent effort into each area of our life such as our career, schooling, or family all the time. We need to allow ourselves to take well deserved breaks, time to think and process. We have to accept that there is a natural ebb and flow associated with our efforts and the sooner we give up our attempt to multitask our life, the sooner we accept that less is often really more. Lisa Earle McCleod’s gracefully reminds us of this in her book, Forget Perfect. And let’s face it, military life isn’t “perfect” but if we can learn to look beyond immediate struggles and accept that it is through our sacrifices that bring life much of its deeper meaning, we can learn to step back and appreciate and honor ourselves.
Pursing our own passions and life goals becomes is a great way to take care of ourselves. Military families shouldn’t feel guilty for pursing an interest outside of military life, or for taking time to accomplish a personal goal, We have all heard the proverbial analogy of the flight attendant who reminds us that in an event of an emergency to adjust our own oxygen before assisting others. The more we treat ourselves to that which we love the easier we can breathe and in turn be that breath of fresh air for others.
Self Care Tips from The Military Spouse Coach
Spoil Yourself Rotten: Life Coach, Talane Miedaner, shares how that we can actually spoil ourselves silly on a shoestring in her book Coach Yourself to Success. One military girlfriend shared that she did this by getting her make-up professionally done at the department store for a minimal purchase. She used some savvy and also left with a free sample of a new perfume to go with her new look. Another spouse implemented one of her tips and volunteered at a local playhouse as an usher; a great way for her to give back to her community while enjoying free shows during her spouse’s deployment.
Splurge on a Shoestring: Life Coach Talane Miedaner also shares how to turn the most mundane activities into luxuries with a little creativity. Her suggestions include things like serving cereal in a fancy bowl adorned with fresh fruit, adding Epson salts to a hot bath, upgrading the dull pencils in your junk drawer for an expensive pen, or adding a candle to the family dinner table.
Take A Well Deserved Break: Block out time in your calendar designated for yourself and your goals. Numerous examples of pursuing personal goals are presented by authors Kathie Hightower and Holly Scherer in Help! I’m a Military Spouse; I Want A Life Too! We all do a great job at keeping lists of what we should do, but make sure that scattered throughout your to-do list is some permission to do just do nothing!
Honoring Yourself Is Honoring Others: We should never feel guilty for taking time for ourselves, and the more we tend to our own needs the more energy we have to handle life stressors with ease.
Krista Wells, Ph.D. is a professional career coach. She specializes in finding careers for military spouses/girlfriends on the go. Through powerful support and encouragement, her clients achieve careers and lives they are truly passionate about! Visit at www.militaryspousecoach.com for lots of free resources on finding a career you are passionate about and living the life you imagined.
Krista Wells is a professional career coach; she ensures that her military spouse clients consistently reap the benefits of her proven expertise in dealing career and life transitions. Through powerful support and encouragement, her clients achieve greater balance and fulfillment, and embrace military life with passion!
Please visit The Military Spouse Coach at http://www.militaryspousecoach.com
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